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09 April 2011 @ 11:47 am
scene: santana & brittany  
santana was tired of all of this. she was tired of artie not-so-subtly rubbing it in her face that brittany had chosen him over her, that she was the loser, blah blah blah. that wasn't very nice, and while she was a bitch, santana had feelings for brittany. strong ones. she was in love with brittany, she didn't just love her, and she was still struggling with figuring out that she was a lesbian. she was so scared, but she had been willing to take a risk and deal with the consequences of having to come out because she thought it would be worth it.

instead, she had just ended up with a broken heart. this was why she didn't do love. but today, with artie, it was just too much. it was all too much. she was going to prom with someone she didn't even like just so she'd have a date, and she was no longer a cheerio, so she was at risk of getting a slushie to the face every single day. and it was all kind of... hitting her. which was how she'd ended up in the girls' bathroom in the second floor science wing, crying by herself in a stall. santana hated crying, she felt so weak, but she couldn't help it. she should have just stayed at carmel.
brittany pierce: 11toomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 03:56 pm (UTC)
she was happy with artie, right? ever since santana told her how she felt, brittany believed that she was happy with artie. okay, that was a lie, she was happy with artie. he made her laugh and smile and yes, he had been terrible about things at first, but now he was an amazing boyfriend. and she did love him. but she also loved santana. more than she loved artie, which was scaring her. and it had been her doing that they talked to miss holiday and sang that song in front of the glee club. she pushed santana to tell her how she felt and now she wasn't even with her.

brittany didn't want santana to go to prom with karofsky. he was mean and he was an asshole. but she couldn't go with santana because of artie, so that obviously left santana with very few options. walking to the girls bathroom in the science wing after she screwed up another chemistry assignment, brittany hummed softly as she washed her hands and suddenly stopped when she heard someone crying. wiping her hands, she walked to the stall and knocked on the door, chewing on her lip, "hello? are you okay?"
Santana Lopez: sexy nurseiwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 04:03 pm (UTC)
santana was mad. she should never have let brittany push her into talking about feelings. she was happy with her routine of not making eye contact or never talking about feelings. if they didn't exist, she couldn't get hurt. sure, she was angry all the time, which made her a bitch, but then she had told brittany how she felt and she had ended up right back at the same place. and now she was being totally insensitive about everything. looking at her like she was stupid for still being with sam, then telling her she shouldn't go to prom with karofsky. it was like brittany had magically forgotten that santana was only doing all of those things because she had rejected her.

of course, when santana chose to cry, she also forgot that this was the period where brittany had chemistry in the science wing, so there was a chance she'd have to use the bathroom. pulling her legs up quickly so brittany couldn't see her shoes, santana didn't reply as brittany asked if she was okay, she just held her breath in an attempt to stop crying. maybe if she was just quiet, brittany would think that she'd been hearing things and go away.
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 04:23 pm (UTC)
brittany bent down just to make sure she wasn't imagining things and she didn't see any shoes or slippers or anything that indicated that someone was in the stall. sighing heavily, she straightened up and pushed her hands through her hair and leaned against the door, trying to listen for more crying. chewing on her lip, she gently knocked on the door and took a deep breath, "hello?"
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 05:01 pm (UTC)
santana was basically counting on the fact that brittany wouldn't figure out that if the door was locked, obviously someone was inside. breathing as quietly as she possibly could, santana brought her legs up to chest, balancing herself carefully on the seat. shifting a little, she growled unhappily as her lipgloss fell out of her pocket and hit the ground, rolling out of the stall towards the blonde's foot.
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 05:08 pm (UTC)
there was someone in there, she figured that out by pushing at the door a little and found that she couldn't get it open. sighing heavily she was about to say something when she noticed a lipgloss tube roll over and hit her foot. brittany bent down to pick it up and gasped as she looked at it.

she bent down on her knees and stuck her head under the door so she could get a better look and all but whined when she saw santana sitting with her knees pulled up to her chest, "san, come out. please?"
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 05:29 pm (UTC)
rolling her eyes as she watched brittany's shadow shifting on the floor, meaning that she was bending down, santana sighed and shook her head. "the point of a bathroom door being closed is not because i want you to stick your head under. it's because i don't want you to see me, and i don't want to see you. you're like violating the basic code of bathrooms, here," she informed her, refusing to look down.

"in case you hadn't figured this out, i'm trying to be alone right now, so if you could just roll me back my lipgloss and be on your way," she pleaded.
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 05:44 pm (UTC)
brittany rolled her eyes and shook her head, "i don't care. you're my best friend and you're crying." her face fell as santana spoke again and she shook her head, moving away from the door to lean against the wall facing the stall, "you're not getting this back and i'm not going. besides, i already made a mess in chemistry, so i don't see the point in going back there."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 05:52 pm (UTC)
shaking her head as she closed her eyes, santana bit down on her lip. "we're not best friends anymore," she informed her, growling unhappily at brittany's stubbornness. "fine, you'll have to leave eventually. i mean you can't stay in here all day, you have other classes. i'll just leave after you do."
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 05:58 pm (UTC)
"you're always going to be my best friend, san," brittany chewed on her bottom lip as she crossed her legs under her and played with the tube of gloss. she couldn't believe that they'd reached this point and she couldn't believe that it was all her fault. sighing heavily, she wiped away at the tear rolling down her cheek and closed her eyes, "i don't care. i'm not going."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 06:01 pm (UTC)
"well you're not my best friend anymore. you're not... anything to me anymore," santana whispered, cursing herself silently as tears started to stream down her cheeks. she just wanted brittany to leave her alone, she was willing to say or do anything at this point. "fine, then i'll leave," she sighed, unlocking the door and making her way out quickly, still keeping her eyes away from brittany's as she went to the sinks to splash water on her eyes, hopefully preventing them from getting even more red.
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 06:19 pm (UTC)
brittany looked up as santana spoke and continued to wipe her cheeks, feeling completely broken. taking a deep breath as the door opened, brittany followed santana at with her eyes, "san..." pushing herself to her feet, brittany moved towards her, but stayed at a safe distance and shoved her hands into the pockets of her shorts, "please just talk to me, santana."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 06:31 pm (UTC)
growling softly as brittany seemed to not get the message that she was the problem, and she was the reason why santana was crying in the first place, santana just ignored her. that was the best course of action. "i have nothing to say to you. i said everything that i had to say and you blew me off to be with suspender boy, so we're done with each other." looking up at her briefly through the mirror as she turned the water off, santana moved to the paper dispenser to get some paper to dry off her eyes.
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 06:37 pm (UTC)
brittany looked down at her boots as she twisted her feet inwards a little. "i know you're angry with me and you hate me and you never want to see me again, but santana, i can't just leave artie because of what happened between us," she looked up at her and wiped at her cheeks again, "it's not that simple for me, i don't want to lose you..."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 06:49 pm (UTC)
"you told me that you wanted us to talk about feelings. you're the one who pushed me into going to see miss holliday. the only thing i tried to do was give you what you told me you wanted, but apparently, i was mistaken." shaking her head, santana folded her arms over her chest. "you're so incredibly selfish," she snarled. "you want artie, you don't want to lose me. what makes you think you get to have everything that you want?" looking away, santana closed her eyes, softening her tone. "i didn't get what i wanted."
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 07:02 pm (UTC)
brittany nodded and looked away, her heart breaking more and more with every single word santana was snarling at her. she didn't even try to stop the tears this time. she was already so broken, she couldn't bring herself to even speak. swallowing back a sob, brittany closed her eyes and stepped away from santana and shook her head and whispered, "you still have me. forever."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 07:07 pm (UTC)
shaking her head as brittany claimed that she still had her, santana couldn't take this anymore. "you said that this relationship was confusing for you, so let me make it crystal clear. we no longer have a 'relationship'. you can't come by because you feel like cuddling or because you want to get your mack on. you can't even come by to water my hedges. from now on, you're just another girl in glee club, same like wheezy or knee socks. i have to tolerate you while we're in the room, but i don't really want to see you outside of that."

it was a lie, but this was what needed to happen, for everyone. turning on her heels, she dropped her hands to her sides and took a deep breath before opening the door to the bathroom to leave.
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 07:09 pm (UTC)
"you don't mean any of that," brittany kept her eyes on the floor, staring at her boots through her tears, "you're lying." why did all of this have to hurt so much? why couldn't she just dump artie and be with santana? because she wasn't that girl. because she wasn't cruel like that. she would have to talk to artie about this before she could do anything.

looking up as santana headed for the door, brittany shook her head and wiped her tears, "i still love you, even if you don't care about me."
Santana Lopez: san and brittsiwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 07:17 pm (UTC)
"no, i do," santana assured her, clenching her teeth. "i mean, why should i care about someone who manipulated me, who made me think that if i was honest with her about how i felt, that we were gonna be together, only to find out that that wasn't true?" she shook her head. "everyone thinks you're so sweet and so honest, but you're actually the worst girl at this school. you used rachel and stole her look so people would pay attention to you. you used artie to try and get back at me. you used me because you wanted a cuddle buddy. at least when i use someone, i'm honest enough to tell them that that's what it is."

shaking her head, santana turned back to her, her eyes burning with rage but also filled with sadness. "right, you love me, but just not enough to pick me when it counts, even though we both know that i love you way more than he ever will."
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 07:21 pm (UTC)
santana's words stung more than she wanted it to and brittany couldn't hold back the tears anymore. she felt like she had been punched in the stomach. she stared at santana, her eyes wide as she listened. shaking her head violently, brittany slipped behind the wall and slid to the floor, pulling her legs to her chest as she buried her face in knees, her body shaking as she sobbed. maybe it was time for brittany to change schools. clearly she wasn't wanted here, except by artie, and she didn't make a different to anybody's life.
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 07:28 pm (UTC)
as much as santana just wanted to up and leave, she hated to see brittany cry. every time brittany cried, her instinct was always to find the fucker who made her cry and punch them, but she couldn't punch herself...

"don't cry," she pleaded, closing the door as she moved to sit down next to brittany. "i shouldn't have said that, that was a bad thing to say," she admitted, looking down at her hands. "you just have to put yourself in my place. you can't expect me to walk around like everything's okay and like i didn't pour my heart out to you only to have you reject me."
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 07:33 pm (UTC)
brittany shook her head as santana sat down beside her, she couldn't bring herself to lift her head to look at her even. santana was right about everything, brittany was being selfish and she couldn't have everything. everything had made sense before artie, like everything made sense before the three of them walked out on coach sylvester.

sniffling, brittany lifted her head and wiped her tears, looking straight ahead of her, "i didn't reject you, san, i just told you that i can't be with you right now." she snuck a glance at her and shook her head, "i love you, you know that, but i have to tell artie about this slowly. i can't hurt two people at once." sighing, she closed her eyes and buried her head again, "it makes me bad person either way."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 07:55 pm (UTC)
rolling her eyes as brittany replied, santana shook her head. "right, because i'm just supposed to sit here and wait for you while you pick him over me day in and day out," she sneered. brittany hadn't waited for her, so why should she have to wait for brittany now?

"you're not a bad person. i'm making the decision for you. you be with artie, like everything was before. there are going to be other girls, brittany. i'll find someone."
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 08:10 pm (UTC)
brittany shook her head and lowered her knees as she used the heel of her hand to wipe her cheeks, "that's not true. i want to talk to artie about us, santana. i want him to know." she looked at her briefly and then turned away as santana spoke again. taking a deep breath, "i am being selfish and saying that i don't want you to be with anyone else, because i want to be with you."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 08:16 pm (UTC)
shaking her head, santana looked down at her hands. "no, he can't know about us, brittany. i lied to you about the whole 'it's not cheating because the plumbing is different' thing. it doesn't matter if it's with a guy or a girl, if you're having sex with someone who isn't artie... it's cheating."

"i want to be with you, too," she admitted, pushing her feet together. "but it's not fair of you to break up with artie. i know it's not. if i hadn't been stupid and pushed you away, then there wouldn't even be a problem. this is all my fault."
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 08:20 pm (UTC)
brittany kept her eyes fixed on a random tile on the wall facing her and nodded as santana spoke, "okay, i won't tell him."

turning to look at her, brittany chewed on her bottom lip and then looked away, sighing heavily, "this is not your fault, san, it's my fault. i shouldn't have pushed you to tell me how you felt." she swallowed hard and closed her eyes, thankful that she had stopped crying, "you're the most important person in my life, i don't want this to stop us from being friends. or anything else we can be later."
Santana Lopeziwantsmystix on April 9th, 2011 08:23 pm (UTC)
pressing her nails together, santana sighed. "i can't, okay? i can't be around you and pretend like everything's okay, that it's normal. i mean, i can't even remember my locker combination when you're staring at me anymore. i don't know how to be your friend, brittany... i'm sorry."

pushing herself up from the floor, santana crossed her arms over her chest as she made her way over to the door, not stopping herself this time as she let herself out.
brittany piercetoomanylyrics on April 9th, 2011 08:28 pm (UTC)
looking at her, brittany sniffled and frowned at her words, "what?" before she could get anything else out, santana was walking out of the bathroom. brittany stared at the space where santana was and then carefully stood up and stepped out of the bathroom, watching her walk away and whispered to herself, "one day, i'll be all yours."